Water Music and Tortes

Vienna is an extremely popular city for tourists. Shops abound filled with tiny busts of Mozart, Beethoven, and Strauss. Hawkers on almost every street corner sell concert tickets, dressed in finery to resemble those musical virtuosos. So is it any wonder that some of the ordinary, everyday things in a place like Vienna might just take on a different appearance, or sound for that matter?

We found that a great (and cheap) way to enjoy a decent lunch on the go was to go to the food places in the U-Bahn stations. For example at the Opera U-Bahn station, we stopped at Anker, a great little chain coffee shop where we could pick up a quick bite and one of the best coffee macchiatos (macchiati?) we’ll ever have. Of course, coffee inevitably led to the need to scan for those two dreaded words, “public restroom.” Living overseas has sometimes turned that necessary visit into quite an adventure—like the evening in an obscure Paris café where I found the toilet to consist of a large square ceramic basin with two raised footrests and a hole. But I was not entirely ready for nature’s call to lure me into a night at the opera.

At the Opera U-Bahn station you can relieve yourself to the lilting strains of Strauss at the “Opera Toilet,” where the stalls have dressing room doors and the music of the Viennese masters is piped in. They even provide you with a photo backdrop bearing the establishment’s hallowed name. So once in the stall, if you feel so inclined you can capture that coveted selfie showing that you answered Nature’s call at the world-famous Opera Toilet! You sure won’t find that in Peoria. By the way, water music (apologies to Handel) does of course, come at a cost. You have to pay 70 Euro cents to get in. Exact change is necessary or you’ll end up tipping the recorded orchestra since the machine does not make change. However, the charge is pretty typical of public toilets in Europe, so the music really is a bonus.

Since I was talking about coffee earlier, it really is a way of life in Vienna. It’s safe to say that ‘coffee culture’ was born here. A local legend dates the birth of the café to the final defeat of the Ottoman army at the second (and final) siege of Vienna in 1683. The story has it that the first coffeehouse in the city was opened by a shop owner with an entrepreneurial bent who found many bags of coffee beans in an abandoned Turkish encampment outside the walls. Whether the legend is true or not, Seattle’s got nothing on this city. Another story says the famous French croissant originated here, with the shape of the pastry being a representation of the crescent that appeared on the Turkish flags. I don’t know if it’s true but there is at least some historical evidence to back the claim. In any event, Vienna has a lot more in its culinary history than schnitzel.

One of the most wonderful varieties of the local brew is Iced Coffee—strong coffee with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, all topped with mounds of fresh whipped cream. And you can use it to wash down a slice of Sacher Torte, another truly great creation of this wonderful place! Of course you can get Sacher Torte in just about every café in the city, but the original and most famous is from the Hotel Sacher itself.

We tasted this luscious confection at a several cafés, just to ensure we were on firm ground when we decided whose Sacher Torte was actually superior. But after our fairly exhaustive taste test, we agreed that the original from the Hotel Sacher was indeed the best. The genesis of the cake dates back to 1832 and the recipe is a well-kept secret at the hotel. It’s made up of a dense chocolate cake that is layered with apricot jam and then topped with a rich chocolate ganache icing. It’s served up with a dollop of unsweetened whipped cream. And just like the Porsche, “there is no substitute.” It’s truly a decadent treat not to be missed when you’re here.